Dating in Beijing: Matchmaking

Unlike in the U.S., where there's apparently "plenty of fish in the sea" for you to choose from, in Beijing, there are only a few fish to choose from.  Matchmaking has been a traditional practice that has survived multiple generations.  Although it is not as formal as it used to be (i.e., arranged marriages), it is still considered the safest and easiest way to find a husband/wife. 
My cousin Chloe (Chen Chen), 25, has been matched 3 times from relatives and family friends.  Couples are usually matched based on age, education, and family background.  Once a match is found, the friend or family member "presents" the suitor's info to the other suitor's family, and vise versa.  If both families agree, then a date is arranged for both parties to meet.  From there, it's up to the couple if they wish to maintain communication through QQ, which is similar to AIM in the U.S. 
Courtships tend to last shorter than in the U.S., couples could decide to get married in as little as 2-4 months.  The length of courtship usually depends on age and parental pressure. 
So back to my cousin Chloe...of the 3, she has continued communication with one.  This is considered her first boyfriend ever and she seems ready to marry him.  However, my family does not approve for various reasons, one being that he has an unstable job at a small company doing import/export.  Because the two of them were matched through a family friend, a lot of gossip has been traveled back and forth between the two families adding more fuel to the fire. 
 
Can you imagine dating like this?!

 

 

Beer flavored tea

Alcohol has always had a presence in my life growing up in Beijing. I vividly remember my grandpa drinking liquor around me and dipping his chopstick into his shot glass to give me a sample.  There's no drinking age in China so kids are exposed to alcohol at a very young age.  However, culturally, the Chinese drink as a way to enjoy a meal.   So it is not a big surprise to hear that there's not a drinking problem among Chinese youth. 
Pictured here is a popular new beverage that is a combination of beer and tea in a bottle designed to resemble a beer bottle.

 

Addicted to affection

Time for one of my most favorite subjects: dating.  Growing up in Beijing, I can honestly say I never saw any sort of affection between a man and a woman.  I have never seen my parents hug or hold hands. It's not until recent years where affection has become somewhat trendy.  Although you still wouldn't see two people making out in public as you might everday around 4am in NYC, it is very common to see young couples holding hands and staring longingly at each other. 
To my surprise, there is also a verbal affection epidemic.  As I got off the plane, a Chinese man immediately got on his cell phone and announced, "Qin ai de, I've arrived."  The phrase "Qin ai de" literally translates to "the one I kiss and love," which I would consider the equivalent to "sweetheart" or "honey."

Kelly finds a husband

He is everything she's ever wanted in a man: tall, pale, and plastic.

Oh, and 50% off.

Kelly introduces the Olympics mascots...in English

I can't understand half of what she's saying but she still so darn cute.

Shrimper ol' me

Most people have the misconception that Chinese people are very short. Maybe my family drinks a lot of milk or something because it seems like they're all taller than me. Here I am standing with my cousin Long Long and Zhao Jing (who is 7 months preggers!). Long Long, 19, is 6'2" and Zhao Jing is 5'11".

L.O.V.E.

No, this is not an Ashlee Simpson song. This post is about love. Before you go vomit, let me tell you that it's not mushy stuff. A while ago, I blogged about how Chinese people don't use the words "I love you." It's just not our style:

@ Yahoo! Video

I now want to modify my blog. From recent observations, the words "I love you" are somewhat commonly used among Chinese youth. Especially teenagers. Relationships have been, until recent years, for practical reasons. You date (usually one person), you marry, you have kids. You know that song from "Married with Children" that goes, "love and marriage..."? The love part was never a prerequisite for marriage in Chinese culture. Now, romance has been imported from Western culture and has permeated the younger generation. Teenagers are coupling up and celebrating Valentine's day by giving flowers, candy, and romantic cards with the words "I love you." Even my little cousin Kelly who is in the 3rd grade tells me that there are 4 couples in her class. And they always pass notes to each other with the words "I love you" (in English).

Whether it's puppy love or Hollywood love, Chinese youth are in love with the idea of love.

Back by popular demand...

Due to an overwhelming number of requests, here again is my cousin Kelly. I know, she's adorable. She's the only person who I would allow to steal my spotlight. Ha.

We have lots in common. She loves clothes, dancing, puppies, ice cream, and funny-looking people. She also thinks boys are annoying.

Happy Birthday, Kelly!

Today's the Olympics opening ceremony. But more importantly, it's my cousin Kelly's birthday. Happy 9th Birthday!!

Meet: AC

Every once in a while, I will profile someone interesting living in Beijing. My first victim is AC. Well, his name is not really AC but he sells air conditioners so we'll just name him AC for now. I met him when we were shopping for - you guessed it, air conditioners. He is a nice looking young man who is only 20-years-old. I found him fascinating because he spoke so eloquently about air conditioners to the point where I wanted to buy 3 or 4 from him. AC told me that he didn't go to college and was a poor student in high school, so he moved from Hebei to make money in Beijing. Similar to how people go to big cities like New York to chase after money. He says he makes about $3000-$4000 RMB per month which is close to the average salary of $3500-$3900 RMB (approx $560 USD) per month. This is considerably high for someone who didn't graduate from college. *I always find it interesting that it is the norm to openly talk about each other's salaries in China. People will freely ask strangers how much they make a month.

Back to AC. He tells me he's fascinated by Americans and especially the way they speak English. It sounds like they're singing. He also asks about US air conditioners: how they're installed, what brands are popular, what Chinese brands are familiar. AC thinks we're so cool because we're from America. He got very excited when we used our VISA card and asked to see it. He held it with both hands like it was precious jewels and carefully returned it to my hands. This type of delusional admiration of Americans is not so prevalent in Beijing anymore, but definitely typifies the behavior of city implants.

AC then tells me that many of his co-workers graduated from prestigious colleges in China. This is a recent trend in Beijing, similar to the US, where many college grads are going against the norm and are either pursuing non-traditional job industries, freelancing, or just bumming around playing video games. This is in part due to the rise in unemployment as well as the new wave of the youth generation who are questioning traditional blueprints and pioneering new paths and ideals.